Conquer Depression, One Step at a Time
- Summer Clarke
- Sep 2, 2024
- 4 min read
You don't understand depression until you can't stand your own presence in an empty room. – Unknown. (1)
This is something we don’t realise until we're alone, until all the distractions are gone and it’s just us and for some odd reason, we don’t feel happy.
We become immobilised in our own thoughts and it seems nothing is possible and these thoughts can grow and grow, from a tiny seed being planted to grow into a giant beanstalk, that seems impossible to cut down.
It is possible.
No matter who you are and where you're at in your journey. It is possible, even if it doesn’t seem like it.
Everything is temporary, including the feeling you're feeling right now, it will pass.
I remembered the little tickle of almost feeling myself again. I was putting a dress on a hanger and I just felt a little wave of self care. It was coming back, that feeling I held on to so strongly that had almost been wiped out by the wonders of depression.
Again, i felt it after a visit to my nan, i was driving back and i felt that wave of self love and care. I loved that feeling, yet I couldn't get to it.
I thrive off main character energy, I had heard about it on social media, yet I never really understood it.
It's something that’s not selfish, it's self care. You only have yourself, and it is a journey to get there, yet it is possible. You’re not going to go from slumping on the sofa to being your own cheerleader in 5 seconds, it’s going to take time.
I think that the biggest play in a journey of healing, there’s nothing you can do except have time. Time and a little sprinkle of action.
You’ve recognised that you're feeling down. What micro action could you take to get the ball rolling? It could be putting on moisturiser, painting your nails, etc. anything that is self care.
The biggest action you can take is getting help, time and action is what is going to push you forward in this slurry of mud you're fighting your way though.
Nobody wants to hear it, getting help? Big ick right? No, it shouldn’t be.
I always thought it was, I'm a very proud person and put on a show of ‘everything is perfect’ ‘I'm handling everything’ until I erupted like a volcano of tears, feelings and sobs.
It’s probably not the most healthy technique for dealing with your problems, yet what i didn’t understand is that ‘if it isn’t broken, don’t fix it’ that goes with your appearance and emotions. If you act like everything is fine, you’re denying yourself the help you actually need.
It’s completely okay to go talk to someone. I found I needed this, though I was journaling consistently, I needed something more and I never needed more than a journaling session.
Journaling is great yet, I've never reached a limit on it. It's something that’s always worked for me, no matter what and my life has improved dramatically since, I remember when I first started doing it. I watched a Taylor Swift video when she was talking about her old journals and what she wrote in them and how she manifested her career, so I decided to do the same. Yet it became so much more, I realised I could use it to clear my thoughts.
It worked wonders and for many years it’s been my therapist, but like I said, it had its limit, depression was something that needed more attention.
One day I visited my parents, they gave me some news which triggered me to my very core. I became a ticking time bomb as I sat there listening to my parents and their friend talk. I felt like Rose from the movie Titanic sat there at the dinner table before she was about to jump, in an era when everyone was putting on a show and their lives were a stage. I couldn’t perform anymore, I stood up insulted as I was and jumped off the boat. (daddy it’s a ship)
Yet after that things started to change, it’s not like I was bottling them up, I just didn’t have the right technique for my issues and believe me whether you like it or not, the correct method will put itself in front of you at the right time. Well, at least that’s what I experienced.
That might not be the case for you, that’s why it’s important to take that step. It’s hard asking people for help, like really hard, almost impossible. Yet it is possible.
‘I don’t need easy, I just need possible’ these are words to go by. I first heard them from Bethany Hamilton, a young 12 year old girl who had her arm bitten off by a tiger shark.
She overcame so much and adapted her way of life around what she could do. She has now been a world champion in surfing, a mother of 4, she's accomplished so much in her life, because she didn’t need easy, she just needed possible.
Do what is possible for you at this moment. Give yourself grace and time to heal. Work on those micro habits and in time you’ll see they’ll make a difference and you’ll be doing them without even thinking.
Give yourself a chance, give yourself time to heal, find the right strategy that will help you, don’t be afraid of asking for help, even the greatest get help, they can’t do it all by themselves.
If you need to explode, do it, things will get better from there, go out, treat yourself, treat yourself like you would a loved one, go do fun things, this era will not be here forever, you have the power to change the way you’re feeling.
Youth Dynamics. (2023). It's Hard: 13 Quotes That Illustrate Depression. https://www.youthdynamics.org/its-hard-13-quotes-that-illustrate-depression/
Here are some resources for mental health services and free talking platforms:
National Health Service (NHS) Every Mind Matters: https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/
Mind UK: https://www.mind.org.uk/
Samaritans: https://www.samaritans.org/
Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
Talk to Frank: https://www.talktofrank.com/]
7 Cups: https://www.reddit.com/r/depression/comments/2cr7s4/7_listeners_from_7_cups_of_tea_rejected_me/]
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